Wednesday, May 4, 2011

Beautiful Things


Beautiful things come from beautiful places.  Love is what sustains us and keeps us safe.  If I come from a place of love, it seems it should be easier for me to give that to others.  Instead, loving is something I have to work on, continuously.  We are all under constant duress from our society and influenced in more negative ways, than positive. 
                                                          
I don’t know why we work so hard on things that aren’t good.  We put effort towards bringing one another down, effort towards deterring each other from success, and we put our effort into behaviors, the ugly ones, like anger, resentment and bitterness.  I used to have a boss who said, “if you look good, you feel good”.  We all had mirrors on our desks, so we could check in with ourselves, to see, if we were projecting a smile from within.  My scowl is awful… my smile is beautiful. 

I was leaving a shopping center and pulled out in traffic too soon, bad timing for the oncoming car.  I received the bird.  I didn’t mean to cause frustration for the other driver.  I wish I could say, I didn’t deserve it, but if I would’ve waited just a few extra moments, the end result would’ve been different.  I’d like to think, if that person knew me, they would’ve waived at me and said, “Oh, that Angie, she must have too much on her mind again”.  Instead, yucki-ness looms. 

Recently, we had a situation where Alyssa made a bad choice with an adult who provides care/supervision for her.  I felt so angry inside, for the choice Alyssa made.  I turned to her and said, with tone, “We DON’T do that!”  Alyssa looked at me, repeated what I said, and cried.  I crumbled inside.   I was completely brought to tears.  My angel knew I was frustrated and disappointed.  Coming from a place of love, she crawled into my lap and said, “You need a hug”.  She was sorry, but turned her energy to me and offered me comfort.  I was ashamed in the way I attempted my lesson with her.  I later wished, I would’ve offered the lesson the way she did, without anger, just love.  See, her bad choice was a reaction to what was happening in her environment.  She was unable to express her need and had reactive behavior.  Unfortunately, I reacted to the wrongful behavior, instead of seeing the whole picture.  Reprimanding behavior is easy.  Recognizing why a behavior happens and constructively coming up with different solutions, this is a challenge.  Alyssa’s bad choice became my good lesson….  A lesson to listen, look, love, then, teach.

Beautiful things can come from a simple compliment, a genuine smile, encouraging words, laughter from within, believing in one another, and a hug.  I am still learning.  Alyssa is my teacher.  I thank God for giving me such a beautiful thing in my life.  She ignites me.  She makes me a better person.  I am the luckiest person to have Alyssa as my teacher.  I can break the negative; my mirror will reflect something positive. 

Thank you for reading and have a great week.  Angie

2 comments:

  1. I can't tell you how many times I wish I wouldn't have reacted and felt "crumbled" like you said. It's one of the hardest moments of being a parent. I totally agree with you that our kids are our teachers, and I too thank God for giving me my kids, as hard and humbling as being a mother can be at times. I loved your last post too and I can't wait to hear how Alyssa likes that Shirley Temple!

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